Hostage
Hostage
-Laurie Benson©2019
KnewMeJournaling
Of course! It takes 18 months
for an elephant to grow
inside its mother.
Strength.
Power.
Wisdom.
Loyalty.
Traits of this spirit animal
for so many.
One tiny brass one hangs
from my rearview mirror-
for hindsight,
I guess.
And this October day,
this last October day,
I remember that
in this month there
was one day full of
raking leaves, cutting
pumpkins from the vine, and
placing dried sunflower heads
out for birdseed.
And you came with news.
18 months worth of news.
I held your little son, who
had carried loads of pumpkins
with me and Pop Pop, this
day, while you thanked us
for being who we are,
Perfectly-Imperfect-Parents.
You, the
Brave
one, brought
healing today with your
Strength.
And shared it with the
Loyal
one and the
Powerful
ones. Two other sons.
The
Wise
one feels it all, all this
fall, even one thousand miles
away. Sorting through his months
while I tell him that,
I hold October hostage.
Finger pointing at this month
for all the trauma, all the
drama, all the falling.
Elephants are also sensitive,
and our family carries plenty
of that trait, fondly nicknaming
ourselves H.S.P.'s, to be sure
to remember, we're
"highly sensitive people."
But the
Reliability
and the
Determination
character traits of the elephant
belong to Little Miss, the sister.
Determined at one time to
save all her brothers,
from all the others.
Now, using those traits
to let go.
So, 18 months, 18 years or
18 seconds to tell me about it,
that's all it takes for me to look,
and know,
and feel that,
I'm not going to hold
fall hostage any more.
There is too much to adore
about you all,
and so much to ignore
about what isn't real.
-photo credit Jaime Hilton-Fotsch
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